Hello hoglets, it is I, back from my hiatus. Between school and other work I simply have not had time to write, but I am back and just in time for Spooktober! In this list I will be ranking the scariest toys ever made (in my opinion, of course), and giving a brief run down on their histories.
10: Chatter Telephones
Are they iconic? Yes. Do I want one? Also yes. But are they creepy? I think a glance at the eyes might answer that for you. Released in 1962 by Fisher-Price, the Chatter Phones have brought both joy and fear to children worldwide.
9: Anatomy Dolls
Damn Barbie, nice bones ya got there.
Made mostly by Jason Freeny (or at least from what I know), anatomy figures take a popular pop culture character and split them in two. I highly suggest you check out his sculptures and prints for some gnarly, slightly spooky fun.
8: Hugo: Man of a Thousand Faces
Hugo, made by Kenner in 1975.
Hugo’s a friend, an enemy, and anything you want him to be! Kenner, I see where you were going with this, but did you have to give him such a cold, blank, stare?
7: Little Miss No-Name
This is another example of great idea, poor execution. Little Miss No-Name is an orphan girl who just wants love and friendship. Well, Hasbro, how am I supposed to love her when her eyes pierce into the very depths of my soul? All jokes aside, I think this is a pretty cute toy which I might talk about in further detail in the future.
6: Teletubby Toys
Source: thinster197 on youtube.
One word: Teletubbies. I’ll pass.
5: Reborn Dolls
Yep, that’s a doll! I admire the artistry, but… why?
Reborn dolls are hyper realistic dolls created from pre-existing doll parts (hence the name). They are usually babies or very young children, and cost a lot. The art is beautiful and requires weeks of work, but the question remains: why? If you’re a reborner or a collector of such dolls, feel free to contact me! Anyways, there’s something unsettling about a baby that looks alive but simply isn’t. Or maybe it’s just babies in general. Babies scare me.
4: Jack in the Box
Anxiety simulator for the tots.
Pop goes the weasel! Welcome to jump-scare central, ladies and gentlemen. There’s no other way to put it: the music can be pleasing, the doll cute, and I’ll still scream.
3: Undead Teds
WANT.
I love Undead Teds, and have an article I’ve been procrastinating on about them. But I can’t deny; they’re REALLY freaky.
Produced by the American Character Doll Company (what a doozy of a name) in the early 60s, Whimsies are whimsical dolls with cute names and personalities. It’s not my fault that I find them terrifying.
1: The Jolly Chimp
No.
What. The. Absolute. Hell. WHO thought this was a good idea? People in the 50’s were not ok. Out of all the toys in this article, this is the only one that genuinely gives me chills. It all started with that scene in Toy Story 2… ugh. I can’t look at that demented monkey any longer.
Howdy, guys and gals. It’s been kind of a while since I’ve written an article. But today is my birthday, and I got some absolutely delightful toys I would love to review and look at. One of them is my unopened, 1999, beautiful powder blue Furby baby!
My sketch of him + the boy himself
Sastrugi is tiny, specifically 11 cm tall. I’ll admit, I knew they were small, but I didn’t know the Furby babies were that small. He has pastel blue fur with a white belly and soft white feet. His eyes are green, which makes for a stark contrast between his pastel pink ears and hair. Like all the Furby babies, his eyelashes are white.
Unfortunately, he didn’t work at first, but after some internal poking around he was operating perfectly.
Functionality
The pentagonal box came with a Furbish-to-English dictionary and an Instructional Manual. I won’t write everything that I’ve read, but I’ll give some general information and fun facts.
Furby baby has an internal sensor, stomach sensor, back sensor, and special forehead sensor that can detect darkness and other furbies. You use the sensors in patterns to interact and help your furby. For example, three claps, a back rub, and a belly squeeze should make the furby go into deep sleep move. If your furby is constipated, a hug might help, and if it’s full you can burp it by stroking the back.
Yes, I put a fake flower crown on my Furby. No, I don’t need help.
The hardest part is getting your furby to sleep. Even though there’s many ways, none of them work especially well. For example, my furby gets nauseous instead of sleepy when getting rocked, and darkness does nothing. The best way I’ve found so far is to rub your furby’s back until they start snoring, singing a lullaby, or saying “way-loh” (sleep) multiple times.
There are hidden games you can play with your furby: Today we played hide and seek. Around 2 minutes into hiding, Sastrugi started complaining about not being found, and when my sister discovered him from under a pillow, he went, “You win! Woohoo!”. Only 3 games are written in the manual, and the other ones you must discover yourself.
Last thing I’ll talk about is their ability to learn English. Within a day, Sastrugi was saying “happy”, “cake,” and “tummy hurt!”. It was pretty impressive. One of the selling points of the furby babies are that they pick up on English quicker, but I wasn’t expecting them to be such fast learners.
On the second day of this journey, he learned more English phrases, and even said, “I love you, mama! Muah!” Needless to say, I love him too.
Final Thoughts
An aesthetic image for my boy.
Why did furbies ever lose popularity? Soft, cute, entertaining, and even educational, I’m incredibly glad to have gotten my hands on one of these babies.
Until next time, cowboys, and remember to may-may (love) your furbies!
Littlest Pet Shop was my favourite toy brand from 3-7 years old. I had tons of them, and I still have two big playsets to this day. Unfortunately, when I immigrated, they quickly lost my interest and I moved on to other toys (such as Shopkins). But LPS has recently come out with a new series of tiny pets, so I decided to crack at them one more time for nostalgia’s sake. Let’s get into it.
Quality
Mini LPS next to an Lol doll, for scale.
Considering how small these are, the quality is great. Out of the two creatures that I got, I found only one bit of plastic sticking out and maybe one scratch of paint. The quality does however vary set to set; the firefly was perfect and the kitten had the small flaws. The toys could rotate their heads (just like regular LPS), which was quite amazing.
What I liked 🙂
My two sets.
I bought these both for $5 at my local drug store, which I think is fair.
The way you open the…erm…playset? Is by “unlocking” it with the key, which I though was really cool. The keys are pretty nice too.
It seems like a sturdy enough toy that you could attach to your bag and not have to worry about it falling off.
Finally, the colour schemes are pleasing to the eyes (I’ve always liked that LPS mostly avoided neon).
What I disliked 😦
Though the shapes of the… lockets… were nice, the interior for both of them was just one solid colour. What’s fun about that?
Also, they didn’t have names, rarities, or anything like that. Like, ok, cool, I got 2-B41. So what? Moj-Moj does this too, and I think we all know how I feel about Moj-Moj.
Conclusion
These toys are relatively cheap and cute. Would I get more? Yes. Are they my favourite? Not really. At least the packaging isn’t the worst, and you can use them as toys for bigger toys or as dollhouse decorations. LPS doesn’t seem to have changed much, but I can’t help but feel distaste towards it, although I doubt that it’s the company’s fault. I’ve just grown up and became bitter. But hey, that’s life.
LPS minis get a thumbs up from me, and see you next time, cowboys.
My birthday is still 3 months away, but it’s never too late to dream about new toys, is it?
(The list isn’t in any particular order).
10. A Furby
It’s no secret that I love Furbies. My deep, dark obsession with them started around 7 months ago, and it’s been going strong ever since. But the problem is, I don’t actually own a Furb, and the one I did have broke down due to battery corrosion. At this point, even a broken Furby would suffice. The specific type of furby that I want is the original version of the Furby baby (I said original, because I in no way would like a creepy 2005 Furby baby in my proximity). Their pastel colour scemes, improved language learning capabilities, and adorably small size make them my all-time favourite furby.
I suppose a before 2001 Furby would be a good replacement. But gosh, the crystal Furbies are beautiful too. Any Furby is a good Furby. Except the 2005 Furby babies.
furb bab
9. Calico Critters House
Specifically the Tree House, but the Starry Point Lighthouse is also delightful.
Lighthouse (with real lights!)
Treehouse (the swing!)
8. Toy Barn
If you’ve read my last post, you would know that I want to make a miniature farm. For that, I would need a barn. The Shleich red barn is optimal, but considering the price, the Melissa & Doug latches barn is a cheaper alternative.
It comes with four farm animals as well.
7. Pikmi Pops Doughmis ❤
I love all things Pikmi. Doughnuts are my favourite baked goods. It’s a match made in heaven!
6. Gudetama… Anything
Does anyone have some good egg puns or yolks?
I absolutely stan this lazy egg. He is the best Sanrio character ever, and that is fact. Enough said.
(P.S.: My instagram account is @justanothereggboi, and I just made a post about a new Gudetama squishy I got. Follow if you like eggs or are just a weirdo in general.)
5. Tiny Squishies
Sorry for the quality!
There is a very specific type of tiny squishy which I’m talking about. They are extremely detailed, and come in many different animal varieties. They sell at almost every toy store in my area. Thing is, I have no idea what the brand is. The squishies are rubbery, and not sticky. If you have any idea what these cool collectibles might be called, please help me out! 🙂
4. Gemma Stone Shoppie
Ruby, Sapphire, Amethyst and Pearl… Now I’m just listing SU characters!
Gemma Stone is also the name of the world’s most expensive and exclusive shopkin, but I’m talking about the shoppie, which you can buy for only $150-$200. What a steal! She is incredibly beautiful and detailed, to the point that I think she is the most gorgeous shoppie you can get. Mystabella, get out of the way, since the best shoppie is here to stay!
3. Cryptkins
Cryptkins are little vinyl figures of monsters and folklore creatures, all with the same adorable red eyes. Every crate comes with a creature and a card that gives info all about them. I already have the Jersey Devil, and at this point I’m just looking to expand my collection.
2. Lee Tea or Marsha Mellow Shopkins
Gorgeous, ain’t she?
Lee Tea is a beautiful golden tea bag, and Marsha Mellow is a glammed-out marshmallow. Tea is one of my favourite things in the world, and I already own the shopkin Herb L. Teabag, so if I got Lee they could be friends. Both Marsha and Lee are limited edition, so that’s just the cherry on top of this glittery cake.
1. Persanimals
You know what, I’ll have to write a whole separate post on these.
Thank you for reading, cowboys! New posts every weekend!
I’m back with a new series and a real monstrosity for today.
Funny-ugly monsters: fugglers!
No, what you are seeing are not real human teeth on some stuffed monsters, although the fact that they’re fake doesn’t make it any less disturbing. Fugglers are meant to be disturbing; but they’re also meant to be strange companions that will warm your shriveled black heart. Today, I’ll be looking at the creepy and cute qualities of Fugglers, and deciding if they are indeed chilling or charming.
Imagine seeing these guys in a darkened alley!
Fugglers either have mismatched button eyes, or cold, vacant ones that can pierce your soul. Some have noses: others don’t. And I believe we’ve already discussed the teeth.
On the flip side, they are relatively soft, brightly coloured, and disproportionally silly. I think it all comes down to the specific Fuggler; for example, the Sketchy Squirrel and Lil’ Demon Fugglers are cute, and this pink one is an absolute nightmare being.
Lil’ Demon
Sketchy Squirrel
I really want to say these are cute, but that would be biased because I really have taken a liking to Fugglers over the past 48 hours. So here is my grand conclusion:
Fugglers are fugging spooky!
Thank you for reading. If you want more information on Fugglers, visit:
I’m about to go on a pretty heated rant. Moj Moj fans beware.
What are Moj Moj?
Moj Moj are essentially little, simplistic, squishy toys that come in pretty colours and triangular packages. They definetly have a neat aesthetic going for them, and I’ll give them credit for the unique packaging. I know I mentioned the packaging twice now, so here, have a look;
They make me crave onigiri for some strange reason.
Pretty stylish. But pretty packaging aside, these wish-list toys are most definitely overhyped. And here’s why.
Stickiness
I know when you have a rubbery, squishy toy the stickiness can’t be avoided. For example, Mashems are very soft and stretchy but they also collect every hair they come across, and never let it go. Moj Moj are the same. Somehow, after being played with for about 20 minutes, they were absolutely COATED with tiny dust and whatever else particles. My hands were clean. The table was clean. And yet they still managed to get dirty.
Back to the material point; the Mojs may look totally adorable in pictures, with their dot eyes and perfect noses, but the reality isn’t like that. If you stretch them, the eyes will come off. If you squish them, the teeny designs on their backs will smudge. Don’t even get me started on twisting; that’s a sure fire way to completely damage the already imperfect paint.
Wrinkles
I only squished them for about 20 minutes.
They were wrinkled all over even before I did anything.
The packaging squished into them, making them wrinkled all over, and nothing seemed to help. Another problem I found with them was that they weren’t nearly as stretchy as they were in the Moj Moj commercials. They did stretch, it just wasn’t as impressive as it was supposed to be.
In case you were wondering, they are not pleasantly scented. Moj Moj all have a slightly yucky factory smell to them. They do not have names, either; just numbers and rarities. Even though I know there’s a LOT of Mojs, I really wish they WOULD be named. It’s a lazy move toy companies pull way too often.
Conclusion
I do not like these toys, and I will never recommend them. That being said, you are free to like and collect them if sticky squishies are right up your alley. Maybe I will get more in the future just to see if they’re all terrible. But in the meanwhile, I’ll sit over here hating Moj Moj and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Anyone growing up in the late 90s/2000s knows what furbies are. I had one, you had one, Suzie from down the street had one. More than once, furbies lost their mainstream appeal, one of these dark periods being quite recently. But now, a brand new furby fandom has arrisen on the internet. Furbies are once again being collected, loved, customized, and for the first time ever even memed. The furbies have taken over the internet – as well as my heart.
Tumblr and the Legacy of the Long Furby
I would consider Tumblr to be the birth place of the modern furby community. I mean, if you were to type in the tag “furby” you’d get many blogs dedicated solely to furbies. Among these, one of the most notable is (of course) the creator of the original long furby, Furby Fuzz (https://furbyfuzz.tumblr.com). But what exactly is a long furby?
The original long furby by Tumblr user Furby Fuzz. ^
A long furby is simply a custom furby which is elongated in the middle using “fur”, stuffing, and a flexible “spine”. It takes a lot of craftsmanship to construct a long furby, and honestly, I’m not exactly sure how to do it myself.
The original long furby inspired others to create their own furby mutants. Now there are many long furbies on the internet; as well as furbies with arms and legs, yarn long furbies, furbies with hair, thicc furbies, and… well, I could go on.
“If I saw an adult human carrying a furby around in real life, I’d be like damn, that person is living their best life. They give zero f*cks.”
Youtuber Strange Aeons
Furby History
Furbies can be absolutely terrifying.
Furbies come in many different shapes and sizes. But in their most basic design, what exactly are furbies? Are they birds with their beaks and claws? Are they fluffy mammals with ears? Are they angelic beings sent to unite humanity? Or perhaps demons, hell-bent on destroying it?
The only thing we know for sure is that they’re robots.
Furbies (or dare I say fur babies) were invented in 1997 by Caleb Chung and Dave Hampton. They soon got Richard C. Levy on their team to help with marketing. He was the one who sold furbies to Tiger Electronics, and they’re still the company who produces them to this day. Furbies were first shown to the world in the 1998 American International Toy Fare.
The reason furbies became so popular is because they were unique. Stuffies with voices who start off speaking gibberish but can pick up words the more you speak to them? I imagine the idea must have sounded pretty strange initially. But the public went wild for these electronic creatures, and furbies were a big commercial success.
Furby History Continued: Styles of Furbies
Although I couldn’t find the first furby ever made, this 1998 leopard furby is surely a classic!
Furbies have gone through 3 main eras. Here I’ll briefly outline each of these.
Let’s have fun!
First slogan for Furby
The first furby era is from 1998-2002. All of the furbies pictured in this post up to this point (except the long furby, of course) come from this era. They have plush ears, a tuft of hair on their heads, 3 toed paws (or 3 clawed feet, if you choose to look at it that way), and realistic plastic eyes. They can wiggle their ears, blink, and open their mouths, but that’s it for movement. If you’re wondering, the bit on their forehead is actually an infrared sensor which allows them to talk to other furbies.
The ‘new and improved’ furbies! The last furby is a funky furby, btw.
Next up are the 2005-2007 furbies, also called the emoto-tronic furbies.
These weren’t nearly as popular as the previous furbies, and just by looking at the above image I’m pretty sure you can figure out why. These new furbies featured creepy plastic feet, rubber beaks, even more realistic eyes, fluffier ears, and to top it all off, they were twice as big. Some parts of the re-design were better: the furbies were more advanced and had no tails (except for the funky furby line), which in my opinion made them cuter. But still, the 2005 furbies flopped. Could Furby make its second comeback?
The answer, of course, is yes.
Which brings us to the 2012-2013 furbies, which I actually consider to be the 2012-2016 furbies, because during this period of time furbies were produced every year. I’m unsure if any new furbies came out from 2017-2019, but here’s to hoping that it happens soon. Anyway, back to the furby info.
The 2012 furbies had LCD eyes which could change as the furby experienced new emotions, as well as rubber ears, a new design around the eyes, and a tail which you could pull to interact with the furby. These furbies looked pretty similar to the original furbies, and were successful in the stores. My first furby was a 2012 Orangutang Orange furby; although they didn’t have official English names, they were named by the fandom. Another cool thing about these re-designed furbies was that they had an app, with which you could play, feed, and take care of your furby.
In 2013 came the Furby Boom, an updated version of the 2012 furby, and in 2014 came the Furby Boom!: Crystal Series. I won’t focus too much on these, because this is turning into a bit of an essay, but I feel that I have to mention these furbies because they are part of furby history.
I just had to show what a crystal furby looked like, ok?
And lastly, in 2016 came the Furby Connect, probably the most abstract take on what a furby is since the emoto-tronic furby. Actually, scratch that, the 2005 furby babies were pretty strange too.
Well folks, that was it! How did you enjoy your trip to Furby Land? I’m planning on sticking around for quite a while. If you guys would like more posts on furbies and furby history, I would be happy to provide. In fact, if I ever get a Shelby I’ll make sure to review it in a pain-stakingly high amount of detail! And if I got anything wrong or could improve this article, please let me know down below.
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